Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize