Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
Come on in and take your pants off
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