is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
