everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
