Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
