if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Tornado booty call.. dedication
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Randomize
