he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
