He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
