It's Friday. Sex?
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
