Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
