singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Are my feet made of real feet?
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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