I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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