I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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