just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
