We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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