And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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