People with herpes should wear stickers.
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
