Texts From Last Night

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  (859): View more from Kentucky

  I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.

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  (859): I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song. http://tfl.nu/z4jp
  Replies (62) Good night (1105) Bad night (3457) Order T-Shirt
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  (972): View more from Texas

  **i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**

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  (972): **i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS** http://tfl.nu/fjtm
  Replies (58) Good night (1616) Bad night (4079) Order T-Shirt
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby

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  (973): She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby http://tfl.nu/drn9
  Replies (13) Good night (507) Bad night (5088) Order T-Shirt
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  my text book just quoted the cookie monster

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  (613): my text book just quoted the cookie monster http://tfl.nu/5m8t
  Replies (24) Good night (8228) Bad night (596) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.

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  (734): Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half. http://tfl.nu/b8ev
  Replies (29) Good night (4300) Bad night (1094) Order T-Shirt
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  You're such a slut.

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  I prefer opportunist.

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  (773): You're such a slut. (318): I prefer opportunist. http://tfl.nu/49c1
  Replies (27) Good night (6412) Bad night (819)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?

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  (814): so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar? http://tfl.nu/t8an
  Replies (16) Good night (1361) Bad night (5156) Order T-Shirt
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  (347): View more from New York

  He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.

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  (347): He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones. http://tfl.nu/swc2
  Replies (4) Good night (660) Bad night (2661) Order T-Shirt
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.

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  (708): Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person. http://tfl.nu/v0my
  Replies (12) Good night (4006) Bad night (1002) Order T-Shirt
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.

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  (319): We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world. http://tfl.nu/rh6u
  Replies (12) Good night (2646) Bad night (1414)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.

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  (+44): i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit. http://tfl.nu/4l0m
  Replies (5) Good night (1857) Bad night (780) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere

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  (914): Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere http://tfl.nu/1kh6
  Replies (3) Good night (1155) Bad night (339) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.

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  (914): I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm. http://tfl.nu/kbjg
  Replies (12) Good night (1343) Bad night (593) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you

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  (425): Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you http://tfl.nu/3zbf
  Replies (2) Good night (623) Bad night (235) Order T-Shirt
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.

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  (580): I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian. http://tfl.nu/4ukn
  Replies (3) Good night (638) Bad night (130) Order T-Shirt

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