feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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