I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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