I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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