Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
