I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
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