I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
