Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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