having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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