Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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