She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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