We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
PANTIES FOUND
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
