this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
