We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
