why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
Randomize
