They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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