Fuck appropriateness.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
