wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're like the curious george of whores
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.