is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
two words...techno handjob
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
