when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
