how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize