it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
