Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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