He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Randomize
