I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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