i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not