Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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