He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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