she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
