YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
BRING THE BAGELS
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Randomize
