How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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