I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize