You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
