IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
