No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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