Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize